40: Design and Live a Life of Your Own Creation: Trust Your Intuition

Terri Hanson Mead is an entrepreneur and helicopter pilot based in the San Francisco Bay Area. She is also author of Piloting Your Life: Take the Controls and Be the Pilot of Your Own Life.

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Here’s what you’ll learn about in this episode:

• Take a look at what’s most important in your life and focus on self-care.
• As women, we were promised we could have it all, do it all and be it all. But it was a false promise as we were not provided with the infrastructure and support. We had the added expectation that we could achieve more, but we still had a foot in the old world, having to do most of the caregiving and carry the emotional load.
• During time outs, take time to breathe as there is too much pressure, especially on women. Remember to say your life is important too.
• Have compassion and empathy for other women who suffer from misogyny. The message to middle-aged women is that they are disposable because they no longer look like the ideal. The messaging that comes from social media is that you can’t be what you are, you need to strive to be something else.
• Terri says she has succumbed to “the whole Botox thing,” and struggles with societal messages that her value is tied to her appearance.
• Accept who you are without judgment and try to stop the comparison game. Stop rejecting the aging process.
• Acknowledge your feelings that getting older is scary. Look for ways to experiment, explore, find things that recharge your soul.
• Let go of “drag,” the things that no longer serve you. Be very intentional. This is hard work! Be super kind with yourself. High-achieving women can be very hard on themselves because we have high expectations.
• We set ourselves up for unhappiness and failure when we don’t treat ourselves with kindness and compassion. Get together with friends. Have conservations that create deeper friendships.
• Cut yourself slack and allow yourself to heal from issues in your past.
• Grieve for losses and get cracking on the things you want to do.
• Many women feel blinded by midlife and unhappy in their forties. Seek greater meaning in your life. Change what you are doing.
• At midlife, don’t accumulate more things, experience more satisfaction and contentment.
• Rebel against toxicity. If relationships are unhealthy, get out of them. Seek greater meaning and greater purpose. Get exercise and find deep and meaningful relationships.
• Many women are socialized to be accommodating and pleasing and not rock the boat or be difficult. Trust yourself and your intuition. It’s okay to change your mind. Say no to what you don’t want, say yes to what you want. Women are socialized to be pleasers and not disappoint others. Let go of what people think.
• Design and live a life of your own creation.