33: Put your Ego and Pride to the Side and Reach out to Others!

Margie Warrell is an author and speaker extraordinaire! She’s spent much of her career telling people how to be brave. She had to find her own courage while her husband Andrew was hospitalized for 30 days in Singapore with Coronavirus, but now he has returned! The rest of her family life these days is mostly virtual as three of her four kids are scattered around the globe. In this podcast, we speak about how to get a better psychological grip on Life in the Time of Covid. We also discuss gifts you can glean from this crisis if you practice gratitude, serve others and tell yourself positive narratives!

If you like what you hear, I’d really appreciate it if you would subscribe, rate and review the show. It’s easy to do on Apple Podcasts, or you can go directly to the podcast section of my website at judyhollandauthor.com.

Here’s what you’ll learn about in this episode:

• Your life is likely very different now. You might feel anxious or overwhelmed or feel waves of fear. Our lives have been upended as we all face challenges with finances, emotions and work. We face unprecedented uncertainty. But, remember, you’ve got what it takes to deal with the challenges that this extraordinary time is throwing at us.
• This storm will pass. Focus on what strengthens you, not what scares you. Breathe deeply to avoid the fight or flight stress response. Get oxygen flowing through your body and feel the ground beneath your feet.
• Give yourself permission to feel whatever emotions arise. The fear is valid. We just don’t want to get stuck in it. Don’t dwell on what makes you anxious. Be intentional about where you are putting your focus. Don’t keep talking to others about how stressful this time it is and how negative the future looks. That will only leave you in a state of negativity, stress and anxiety.
• Ships don’t sink because of the water that’s around them—they sink because of the water that gets in them. Don’t let fear set up residence in your head. The conversations you have in your head and with others are shaping your experience. If you spend your time thinking and talking about sources of stress, you will feel more stressed.
• Good things will come out of this storm. Some people will grow in enormous ways. We can emerge with a deepened appreciation for life. We have opportunities in the midst of this global pause to do good things and be a source of goodness for others.
• Three months ago, most of us would have reported a lot of anxiety and fear and being really busy. Now, we wish they could have that time back. Life back then looks perfect in retrospect, but we didn’t see it that way. We were thinking about all the other things that weren’t quite right at the time.
• Double down on gratitude. Appreciate technology that connects us! Gratitude is a tonic for life’s difficulties and not something we should practice only in good times. The times we really need to be grateful are when it’s not easy to be grateful. Focus on what you have, not what you don’t have.
• Don’t miss out on the hidden gifts this time holds. Take note of the words of Maria Rainer Rilke, who warned humanity not to “squander our hours of pain.” Don’t dwell in fear. Focus on challenges you face and transform this pain into a catalyst to create your best self and a better world.
• Seek out authentic, meaningful connection with others. Deepen your relationships with others you care about. Steer clear of superficial interactions. Take the focus off yourself and seek out how you can serve others and lift them up. Pick up the phone and call someone or write a note. Cook a meal for someone.
• People who have the strongest social networks report the greatest levels of well-being. Don’t wait for others to reach out to you. Put your ego and pride to the side, risk rejection and reach out to others! People really appreciate the outreach.
• Sit down and write a list of how you want to show up for others over the next few months. Do you want to be viewed as optimistic, calm, confident, upbeat, fun, playful, joyful, grateful, creative, open-minded? Put a sticky note on your fridge and remind yourself who you want to be. Be intentional about how you move through this time so you can weather this period better and emerge better off.